New Belgium Springboard Ale

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cog_nate
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New Belgium Springboard Ale

#1 Post by cog_nate » Thu Feb 15, 2007 10:08 am

Springboard Ale is the latest seasonal beer from New Belgium, and a radical leap forward in beer design and technology. The recipe is a basic blond ale but includes goji, schisandra and wormwood -- ingredients named after Ranma 1/2 characters or something.

Radical enough, you say. You don't know the half of it, stupid.

The secret revolution is that the act of drinking the beer opens up a wormhole in your mouth, whisks your tongue through a dimension not of sight or sound but of SHAZZAM! and plants it firmly in Peter Bouckaert's ear canal; then, rather than returning your tongue not to your own world, banishes it to the land of wind and ghosts. The resulting aftertaste is of lemons, horse and wax; or maybe ghost lemons, ghost horse and wax. (I don't think wax has a soul so it can't be ghost wax but I'm too lazy to Google it.) Suffice it to say that, unless you have some sort of weird flavor fetish, this beer will leave you regarding New Belgium as possessors of a certain mad genius and wishing they'd use their talents for good instead of evil.

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cog_nate
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#2 Post by cog_nate » Sun Jun 01, 2008 10:15 pm

The 2008 version of Springboard Ale is an even greater leap forward in time, space and beer brewing... I mean, it's a year later, durhey.

Crack open a bottle of Springboard and take a listen -- those snickly-snackly sounds you hear are little humbugs bustling around, scrambling to find a trade before you ingest them. Take a swig, don't be shy.

The conservatively dressed outfitter humbug will take that coat off your tongue, thank you very much, and outfits you for your journey. He'll send you off with a light spank, and you thank him. The musclebound, disconcertingly effeminate guide humbug will then lead your slacker tastebuds into sprucey, citrusey heights. The spritely, oak-strong humbug will lead you home, step after taught, bitter step. You'll arrive home ennervated, a bit anxious about the future, but satisfied in the knowledge that you were not led wrong this year.

The beer tastes pretty good, too.

Mr. Blues
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I apologize in advance but here goes:

#3 Post by Mr. Blues » Mon Jun 02, 2008 8:05 pm

1. Sure wish I'd read the 2007 review before buying a twelver.

2. Was told it was a hoppy beer but had some unique to put it mildly, flavors. The clerk flat out said he didn't like it. I figured for $9 a twelver, how bad could it be??

3. Nowhere on the outside of the twelve pack carton was there ANY description of, 'this wood, that wood, ancient oriental spices (must've meant: been laying around for years), 2% aged in oak, etc.' or I would've been more cautious.

4. Three times I gave it the old, ya gotta have a second one after the first to see if you get the same reaction taste test. Three times I came up with the same conclusion:

For MY preferences (hops galore, maximum flavors) even giving them the benefit of the doubt seeing as it's a spring seasonal, this is a beer I'll never buy again, strike that, never drink again unless it's 100 degrees out, I just came in from mowing the lawn & there's no other beer in the house.

I don't know where the clerk thought it was hoppy because I didn't detect any hops, bitterness or citrus over the distinct woody, funky, stale, (waxy & horsey INDEED), flat, scrape-the-film-off-your-tongue-quick-what-the-hell-IS-that-taste-anyway-did-someone-stick-a-piece-of-driftwood-into-a-Coors?, kinda flavor.

I've had beers aged in oak before (Flying Dog Wild Dog Gonzo Imperial Porter) but this one just ain't right.


Some of you may like, nay, prefer this beer & I'm sorry for the negative review & going, 'against the grain' (wood not malt).

On first, second & third attempts it's shot up into my top ten, never again beers.

It also reconfirmed my belief that there ain't a New Belgium offering out there that somebody's not doing much better at the same or less price.

How about a Fat Tire ale, right NOW?

****, NO!!


Please take this rebuttal with a grain Oi! AGAIN with the wood references! of grain & remember that it may well be it takes sooo much extreme hops & flavors to impress my tastebuds that I'm almost incapable of being able to discern 'hints' of anything.

Mr. Blues
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An epiphany!

#4 Post by Mr. Blues » Tue Jun 03, 2008 7:37 am

Last night after I posted the above spiel I had one of the last 2 Below I've been saving & immediately got the same funky, skunky, what-the-hell-IS-that taste.

Maybe it's the water or something else in all the New Belgiums but it's an across-the-board flavor that doesn't sit well with my senses.

barry
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#5 Post by barry » Wed Jul 16, 2008 10:59 pm

all i can say is - good!
if you don't like it then there's more for me,
'cause i like it a lot.

(although, it's not as good this year
because they changed the recipe.)

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Bill
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#6 Post by Bill » Tue Dec 16, 2008 8:25 pm

no reason to raise this thread up again, but why the hell does it have over 2,300 views? I think this thread has seen more action than the tap handles over at Shane's.
Thanks!

--Bill

all your mash are belong to us

Greenblood
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#7 Post by Greenblood » Wed Dec 17, 2008 4:53 pm

I imagine it is a result of Search Engine views. You may notice that all the views are high on the commercial review threads.
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"If your feelings were grapes I would crush them. And then, after fermentation, drink them down. And quite possibly later, throw them up again."

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